See, YOU are the man she originally fell-in-love with. YOU are the one she chose to build her original dream of a family. YOU were, maybe still are, the man of her dreams. However, even though you may have moved-on, by making the decision to stay active in your children’s lives, by default; you are also active in their mother’s life. Being too cozy with the ex didn’t mean getting a little action on the side between dates; rather it’s all the things normally reserved for much more intimate relationships. Activities like vacationing, attending holiday celebrations or coming over for game nights. Let me get one thing straight- I did these things with my ex-wife NOT because I wanted to get in her pants (uh, way beyond that) or to rekindle any kind romance (she wishes); I spent time around my ex, so I could spend more time with my kids. To be frank, I don’t like the person my ex had become and wouldn’t choose to even be her friend.

The Price I Paid If your ex is anything like mine, she’ll think that all this time and effort you’ve spent has been for her. The minute she realizes YOU are no longer hers, prepare for the nightmare to commence. In my case, everything was hunky-dory for 10 post- divorce years until I decided to get remarried to a beautiful, intelligent, sexy woman. Did I mention my new wife looks 10 years younger, has a great body, and is a much cooler person to boot. Even though, I was investing the same time with the same activities with my ex and children; from her perspective, it all changed because she realized that I was no longer there for her.

Even with separate lives, in your ex-wife’s head, you still belong to her. Don’t believe me? So what happened? Within 6 months of my nuptials my ex, without my consent, told my children that they have a voice and a choice as to where they want to live. Of course, the children whom I’ve taught to be faithful to family were not given “permission” to like my new wife. One child decided to stay and the other, well….

Fortunately, my kids are my kids for the rest of my life-whether they live with me or not. I’ve accepted the fact that someday, if not already, they’ll understand what being too cozy with their mother has done.

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Last-modified: 2022-09-08 (木) 23:09:13 (203d)